Self Acceptance and The Art of Loving Yourself - The Sequel

Self Acceptance and The Art of Loving Yourself – The Sequel

0 Comments 27 July 2008

In my previous post about this subject I wrote about self acceptance and loving yourself. In this post I want to elaborate and tell you an interesting allegory I recently read.

One man was so troubled by the look of his shadow and felt so detested by his footprints and steps, that he decided to get rid of them. He decided to run away from them. He stood up on his feet and started running, But every time he laid another step on the ground, another step was created, and his shadow caught up with him without any trouble.

He decided that the shadow caught him because he didn’t run fast enough. He hasten his steps, and ran faster and faster, without stopping, until eventually he dropped down and died.

he didn’t understand that if he would just stand under the shadow of a tree, His shadow would disappear, and if he just sat quietly ,then there wont be more steps.

Most of us act a lot like this man. we try to run away from our shadows.
The shadow in this allegory is anything you don’t like about yourself, may it be your anger, grief, fear, greed or even physical attributes like your nose. When you’re alive you cast a shadow there is no other option. However the shadow isn’t real, It cant live on it’s own it’s there because some of the sun beams that hit you are blocked and can’t pass through.

People create their confusion by creating an ideal. They are trying to reach an ideal and Because of it they condemn themselves for not being the way they “should”. When you compare yourself to your ideal you feel like something is missing.

How can you be happy if you have so many things that need to happen before you can feel happy. Have you ever noticed that it’s enough for one little thing to go wrong and you can feel bad? Why not reverse it. Make yourself a lot of conditions that need to occur before you can feel sad and feel happy because of the smallest things.

When you think “if only this will happen then I will be happy” you’re putting a barrier between yourself and happiness because even if it will happen there will always be something else.

Once you agree that anger or fear or “bad” thoughts will reside in you, you will be on the right path to self acceptance. It’s similar to a situation where your house is full of darkness and you say that the darkness needs to go away before you hit the light switch. The darkness is simply the absence of light it isn’t real and when you will turn on the light it will go away. Fear ,anger etc are not real they are the absence of a happy and fulfilled life. It is because you can’t have fun that you’re angry other people are only an excuse.

God has created you and you condemn yourself? You are basically saying that god is wrong and everything should be according to what you say. You can’t be smarter than god nor can you change what he created. The paradox is that once you accept yourself you and everyone around you will be different and life will become easier.

The man in the story tried to escape from his shadow, and that’s how most of us act. When we feel anger we say to ourselves don’t feel like that because “it’s not good” or someone said it’s bad. By doing so you’re stifling your anger and with time it becomes rage. Then your anger will permeate your thoughts and your body.

Once you see that you are still angry you say to yourself I haven’t stifled enough I should do it more even though it’s the reason for the rage in the first place. When you fight with yourself you always need to be on the guard because if you let go maybe your anger will resurface.

Where ever you will run your shadow will catch up, running isn’t the answer. Sitting under the shadow of a tree is. The shadow is peace and quiet. When you close your eyes the rays of the sun can’t penetrate and you can meditate to achieve your peace. The answer is within not in the world around you.

If you fight something you’re making it important. You’re focusing on it and it effects you. If you fight with the thoughts you have to use arguments. you’re trying to convince your mind. Just let go. When you clean your room there is no argument, You’re not saying to the room now I will clean you because you’re messy. You simply do it because it’s messy.

Here is another great video about self acceptance and loving yourself.